Why Model Airplanes Crash - Article

[Colonel Klank]

Why Airplanes Crash - Article
The saying, "Sometimes they fly, and sometimes, they die", has held true since the first aeromedelers launched their frail craft into the winds of chance. The force that seems to drive this saying is now summed up by the introduction of two new naturally occuring forces of nature. "Emotional Torque", and "Kinematic Ugliness". These two forces seem to be what is causing our most prized aircraft to either live long, productive and happy lives, or to go immediately into an "Anteater", or to take a "Dirt Sample", or simply go "Floppy Chicken".
For instance; an Ugly Stik with a drippy, wheezy K&B .40 cannot even be forced to the ground by turning on the "Crash" switch, taking off with all servos in reverse mode, or even flying with another transmitter in the pit turned on and finely tuned to your frequency. It's Kinematic Ugliness factor will actually repel it from the ground and the fact that you hate it will ensure that it will be around long after your most prized ship has been removed from the runway by a large Caterpillar excavator and several sticks of well placed dynamite.
Emotional Torque, however, is the force that inexorably draws your most loved and beautiful ship into the ground long before the pride of new ownership has even begun to wear off.
It is worth noting that in 1724, Sir Isaac Newton, discovered these forces, purely by accident, and chronicled them in several articles. Even though the first balloon flights were 49 years away, Sir Newton seemed to have a grasp on the future ramifications of these two phenomonon.
"After many evenings spent in taverns and other places of merriment, I noticed that my favourite and most prized ale tankard would somehow be damaged beyond repair, whether it be simply knocked off of a table by a drunken oaf, or kicked by an unruly mule, while a grotty, leaky one would survive even after being dropped of an upper story balcony during one of our Hucking parties. (hucking was a term in the 1700s that described; drinking, merriment, and shooting fireworks into an occupied outhouse.) My good friend, Biff The Saddle Maker, remarked as well that this phenomenon, though yet unnamed, will plague Huckers for many years to come. Biff The Saddle Maker is also know for his intestinal prowess and can set forth such a farht as to put to shame a clap of thunder."
So, I guess we should just man up, go to the field and fly them like we hate them. Good Luck! "Go Big, Fly Hard".

[TheTank]

I have a couple of those birds that I just cant seem to kill... One is a beater ugly stick 40 that I use at the limbo every year. Even after 4 rudder drags, two inverted wing tip drags, and a full power touch, slide, vertical upline to straight in, the thing was barely broken... it just wont die... Yet my little 50cc Yak last year, although it had the ugliest color scheme known to man, flew great, and had a very premature fate!!!

[Colonel Klank]

Tank:
I think you ought to sumbit that sequence to the IAC!

Let's see....it would look like this in the book:
R-drag x 4, invert wtg x 2, FP-50gritpass, Vup, bender to auger, WTF!!!

Quique would build a special plane for this manouver!

LOLOLOL

[gforce]

Well put ole Chap!

[Colonel Klank]

gforce:

Thanx

[krashmaster81]

here's my example of an uncrashable... it fits the bill nicely!

gremmy 2.JPG

[Biff]

Once again Pat you have brought up another modeling truth; the pretty ones die young. I had MadMax run me some guz-intas, here's what I've extrapulated;


Pretty x flying straight x wow factor x emotional attatchment x cost = longevity (in seconds)

Ugly x flight like a bannana x ARF x don't give a darn x hand me down = infinity

Mass attracts pretty, good flying airplanes

Mass repels ugly ARF's

When you bolt your best motor on your best airplane, it throws a prop.

When you bolt your worst junker .60 glow motor on a fuel soaked warbird, it runs like a Rolex.

When you take your #1 bird to a field on Saturday and fly the best you ever have, nobody shows up.

When you take your junker to any field on a Monday morning and fly like junk, the news papers are there doing a story on the state of the art for models.

Your 2 year old only plays with a claw hammer when you just complete your best covering. "Look daddy!!" Bang Bang Bang on the TOP SIDE of the wing!!!

You could leave your junk on the hand grenade practice range at Paris Island and it wouldn't get a scratch.

Leave your junk in Saharah desert for 200 years and there would NEVER be a bubble in the covering.


The humidity changes 1% in your shop and number one bird looks like a raison in a hot tub.

[janatle]

I just agree!!! ITS ALWAYS LIKE THAT!!! i dont fxxx understand it

[flyin woodbutcher]

We need a serious check list on this one. I'll start.

1) Hey Steve did you lock-tite the engine mount bolts ?
2) Hey Steve did you lock tite the H9 control horns ?
3) Hey Jamie did you charge the battery or is it any good ?
4) Hey Kent did you glue the fuel tank mount or what ?
5) Hey Kent did you lock tite the rudder servo screws , this could have been real serious.

FWB

[Colonel Klank]

Bump.

For Tank and Sleepy.

[JAMPILOT]

Aren't thing like this called "MURPHY'S LAW"? Damn that guy!!!

[andywynn]

Ugly planes don't crash because the ground repels them!!!!!!