lame joke thread

[Pilot'sWyfe]

Another one...we get these all the time at work. While being completely productive, of course!

One day, when a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river, her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?"


The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family.


The Lord dipped His hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls.


"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked


The seamstress replied, "No."


The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a silver thimble ringed with sapphires.


"Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.


Again, the seamstress replied, "No."


The Lord reached down agai n and came up with a leather thimble. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.


The seamstress replied, "Yes."


The Lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep, and the seamstress went home happy.


Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the riverbank, and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water. When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?"


"Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!"


The Lord went down into the water and came up with George Clooney.


"Is this your husband?" the Lord asked.


"Yes," cried the seamstress.


The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!"


The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to George Clooney, you would have come up with Brad Pitt. Then if I said 'no' to him, you would have come up with my husband. Had I then said 'yes,' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so THAT'S why I said 'yes' to George Clooney.


And so the Lord let her keep him.


The moral of this story is: Whenever a woman lies, it's for a good and honorable reason, and in the best interest of others. That's our story, and we're sticking to it.


Signed,
All Us Women

[Pilot'sWyfe]

WHY MEN ARE NOT SECRETARIES:

Husband's note on refrigerator to his wife:

Someone from the Gyna College called.
They said, Pabst beer is normal.



You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.

On your right side is a sharp drop-off.


On your left side is an Elephant traveling at the same
speed as you.

Directly in front of you is a galloping Kangaroo and
your horse is unable to overtake it.


Behind you is a Lion running at the same speed as you
and the Kangaroo.

What must you do to safely get out of this highly
dangerous situation?




If you do not know, see answer below....


















Get your drunk ass off that merry-go-round!






The top 10 unintentionally worst company URLs


Attn: Entrepeneurs
Everyone knows that if you are going to operate a business in today's world you need a domain name. It is advisable to look at the domain name selected as other see it and not just as you think it looks. Failure to do this may result in situations such as the following (legitimate) companies who deal in everyday humdrum products and services but clearly didn't give their domain names enough consideration:

1. A site called "Who Represents" where you can find the name of the agent that represents a celebrity. Their domain name is
www.whorepresents.com

2. Experts Exchange, a knowledge base where programmers can exchange advice and views at
www.expertsexchange.com

3. Looking for a pen? Look no further than Pen Island at
www.penisland.net

4. Need a therapist? Try Therapist Finder at
www.therapistfinder.com

5. Then of course, there's the Italian Power Generator company
www.powergenitalia.com

6. And now, we have the Mole Station Native Nursery, based in New South Wales:
www.molestationnursery.com

7. If you're looking for computer software, there's always
www.ipanywhere.com

8. Welcome to the First Cumming Methodist Church. Their website is
www.cummingfirst.com

9. Then, of course, there's these brainless art designers, and their whacky website:
www.speedofart.com

10. Want to holiday in Lake Tahoe? Try their brochure website at
www.gotahoe.com



Alright, I'm done.

[wizard]

#4 reminds me of a lady I used to work with. She was going to school to be a respiratory therapist. Her Email was resptherapist@*****.com

[Pilot'sWyfe]

	Quote: Originally Posted by wizard
	#4 reminds me of a lady I used to work with. She was going to school to be a respiratory therapist. Her Email was resptherapist@*****.com

*snerk* That's awesome. Just goes to show how careful we must be...lest we get posted on someone's website. lol

[Dangerous Dan]

Call me an idiot but I don't get number 6?

[leeMcCrory]

ALL RC RELATED SUBJECTS EXCEPY 3D fix-wing low-down huckin is for puss-cloths? I,M,H,O

[hillmanr2]

	Quote: Originally Posted by Dangerous Dan
	Call me an idion but I don't get number 6?

#6 molestation nursery

[Dangerous Dan]

LOL I feel blond

[NCFRgal]

	Quote: Originally Posted by Dangerous Dan
	LOL I feel blond

Then don't go back to your post and see how you spelled idiot.

[Dangerous Dan]

	Quote: Originally Posted by NCFRgal
	Then don't go back to your post and see how you spelled idiot.

typographical (error)...LOL