The biker and the little old lady

[wizard]

Donald D Hawkins biker stops by the Harley Shop to have his bike fixed. They
couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. He stopped by the feed store/livestock dealer and picked up a
couple of chickens and a goose. However, he now had a problem: how to carry all of his purchases home.

The owner said, "Why don't you put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand?"

"Hey, thanks!" the biker said, and out the door he went. But in the parking lot he was approached by a little old lady who
told him she was lost. She asked, "Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?"

The biker said, "Well, as a matter of fact, I live at 1616
Mockingbird Lane. Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time."

The little old lady looked him over cautiously then said, "I am a lonely widow without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me up against the wall, pull up my skirt, and ravish me?"

The biker said, "Holy smokes lady! I am carrying a bucket, an anvil, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?"

The lady said, "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the anvil on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens."

[wizard]

The biker and the little old lady 2

There was an old lady that was a little rough around the edges. She didn't have any family left and decided that she wanted to join a biker gang.

She checks aroung and finds the address for the local motorcycle club. She goes down to the clubhouse and knocks on the door. Well the club president, Dawg, comes to door to see what is going on. He throws the door open and asks, "What the F@#K doyou want?"

The little old lady explains that she would like to join their club, She says, "I have been riding motorcycles since before you were born. I own 3 bikes, A shovle head, an old servi car, and a custom chopper with an evolution engine."

Dawg, impressed with the old lady decides that maby it would be fun to have the old lady around. He thinks that since she doesn't have any familly around, she might leave the bikes to the club when she dies. He starts to ask here some questions.

Dawg, "Do you Drink?"

LOL, "I can drink a half gallon of whiskey and then folow that with a case of beer."

Dawg, "Have you ever been in a fight?"

LOL, "I can bust heads with the best, I have a weighted pool cue that I use."

Dawg, "OK, one more question. Have you ever been picked up by the fuzz?"

The Little Old lady thinks for a little bit then answers, "No I can't say that I have, But I have been swung around by my T!TS a few times.

[Kiwi]

Wizard,

They are both good yarns but No1 got everyone looking at me once again.

I gotta stop looking at FG jokes when I´m at work. Its getting me into trouble.

Kiwi