Welcome to The FlyingGiants! - please login or click this bar to join our community...


Go Back   FlyingGiants > Off Topic Discussion > Humor
Forgot your password? Create a new account

Thread Tools
Old 02-05-2006, 03:38 AM   #1
It will fly!!!
wizard's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Washington, Indiana
Age: 51
Posts: 9,067
Send a message via Skype™ to wizard
Default letters between husband and wife

Dear Husband:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good.
I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to
show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell
me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last
week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and
nails done, cooked your favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.
You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after
watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't
touch me or any thing. Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore,
whatever the case is, I'm gone.

P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving
away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!

Your EX-Wife

Dear Ex-Wife

Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that
you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is
a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown
out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when
you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was
"You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you
can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have
gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork
seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee
because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence
that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and
your negligee was $49.99. After all of this, I still loved you and felt that
we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten
million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica. But
when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess.
I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your
letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was
born Carla. I hope that's not a problem.

Signed Rich As Hell and Free!
Prevent Darwinism become a paramedic!!!

Never try to teach a pig to sing! It wastes your time and it annoys the pig!!!

Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

Powered by Jim Beam

wizard is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-05-2006, 06:40 AM   #2
Eccentricus Magnus
KrisW's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Brazil, MT
Posts: 3,629
Default Re: letters between husband and wife

Ther phrase "poetic Justice" comes to mind. .

If only all divorces were that easy
"Mediocrity is doing it THEIR way"
KrisW is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-05-2006, 07:24 AM   #3
It's official, thanks Verne...
Boulder's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: United States, TX, San Antonio
Age: 55
Posts: 11,097
Send a message via Skype™ to Boulder
Default Re: letters between husband and wife

I've seen that one somewhere...It still makes me smile everytime I read it, though

Now, where did I put those dang lottery tickets?
Ken Thompson

Fellowship of Christian Modelers
Boulder is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-05-2006, 09:26 AM   #4
they call me....the gas man
crazyextra's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 390
Default Re: letters between husband and wife

Thats Frickin Awesome!!!
Its better to be on the ground wishing you were flying, then flying wishing you were on the ground!!
crazyextra is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-05-2006, 12:46 PM   #5
Teen Scene Staff
Cajun's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Franklin, Louisana
Age: 28
Posts: 370
Send a message via AIM to Cajun
Default Re: letters between husband and wife

That's too funny!!!
Why don't all you little kids quit fottin around and get a real hobby like golf?

Pro-Bro #350

Never forget the the Capitol K.
Cajun is offline   Reply With Quote

Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
Thread Tools

All times are GMT -5. The time now is 01:27 PM.

All Flyinggiants.com content copyright 2006-2015 by RCGroups.com, LLC except where otherwise indicated. The Flyinggiants.com logo is a trademark of RCGroups.com, LLC.
Please report any misuse of our trademarks or copyright violations using the contact form.
RCGroups Network :: RCGroups :: Crackroll :: RC Cars

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.