How the fight started...

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**Boulder** · 11-16-2007, 08:46 PM

Please take this in the context in which it was intended...I received this in an e-mail...

Subject: How the fight started

I rear-ended a car this morning. So there we are alongside the
road and slowly the driver gets out of the car . . .
and you know how you just get sooo stressed at life
that stuff seems to get funny?

Yeah, well, I could not believe it . . . he was a DWARF!

He storms over to my car, looks up at me and says, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"

So, I look down at him and say, "Well, which one are you then?"
and that's when the fight started.

eagle1 · 11-16-2007, 08:51 PM

well?
you know that would start a fight.. still found it funny.

bodywerks · 11-16-2007, 08:51 PM

OMFG! That's WRONG!!!!!

ifly3d · 11-16-2007, 08:53 PM

LOL

**Boulder** · 11-16-2007, 08:56 PM

I am so sorry...I should just kill this thread...I feel so bad...

ShortBus · 11-16-2007, 09:10 PM

I am offended by this.

excelpoint · 11-16-2007, 09:19 PM

Sorry but that right there was just plane funny. LOL

**wizard** · 11-16-2007, 09:19 PM

I think I would have said "I know, you look like Grumpy!!"

Absolut Yak · 11-16-2007, 09:25 PM

Wiping away the tears! That was beautiful!

Lord, I apologize, and be with all the starving pigmies in New Guniea, AMEN.

**Boulder** · 11-16-2007, 09:29 PM

	Quote: Originally Posted by djccrn
	Wiping away the tears! That was beautiful! Lord, I apologize, and be with all the starving pigmies in New Guniea, AMEN.

Git 'er dun!!!

dangerboy · 11-16-2007, 09:41 PM

Here's another one along the same lines:

Please pray for Fred

Fred was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him: "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less than 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!!"
The next morning Fred got up early and left for work.When his wife woke up she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, and brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.
Fred has been missing since Friday. Please pray for him.

Mudsurfer1234 · 11-16-2007, 09:46 PM

ShortBus, you're like 9 feet tall... you take no offense...

i on the other hand, who IS a dwarf, do take offense... but i'm sneezy...

so it's a funny joke anyway!! hahahaha lawl lollerskatesinthemorningilikeeggs!

3ddd · 11-17-2007, 12:11 AM

i don't care how big or small ya are that there is just plain funny *****

RTK · 11-17-2007, 12:34 AM

THE MIRACLE OF TOILET PAPER

Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my
husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically
telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a
suggestion.

"If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet
paper and rub it between them for a few seconds."

Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in
front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this
take?" I asked.

"They will grow larger over a period of years," my husband replies.

I stopped. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between
my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?"

Without missing a beat he says "Worked for your butt, didn't it?"

He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk
again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a
straw

50%plane · 11-17-2007, 07:06 AM

lol

11-16-2007, 08:46 PM	#1
Boulder It's official, thanks Verne... Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Cleveland, TX Age: 52 Posts: 11,088 Awards Showcase Total Awards: 2	How the fight started... Please take this in the context in which it was intended...I received this in an e-mail... Subject: How the fight started I rear-ended a car this morning. So there we are alongside the road and slowly the driver gets out of the car . . . and you know how you just get sooo stressed at life that stuff seems to get funny? Yeah, well, I could not believe it . . . he was a DWARF! He storms over to my car, looks up at me and says, "I AM NOT HAPPY!" So, I look down at him and say, "Well, which one are you then?" and that's when the fight started. __________________ Ken Thompson Fellowship of Christian Modelers http://www.fcmodelers.com

11-16-2007, 08:51 PM	#2
eagle1 Bad-ass Super Contributer! Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Andrews Tx. USA Age: 40 Posts: 1,229	Re: How the fight started... well? you know that would start a fight.. still found it funny.

11-16-2007, 08:51 PM	#3
bodywerks Bad-ass Super Contributer! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Tucson Age: 36 Posts: 5,229	Re: How the fight started... OMFG! That's WRONG!!!!!

11-16-2007, 08:53 PM	#4
ifly3d Bad-ass Super Contributer! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: zebulon,NC,USA Age: 37 Posts: 1,962	Re: How the fight started... LOL __________________ www.joshbunn.com www.vessaero.com

11-16-2007, 08:56 PM	#5
Boulder It's official, thanks Verne... Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Cleveland, TX Age: 52 Posts: 11,088 Awards Showcase Total Awards: 2	Re: How the fight started... I am so sorry...I should just kill this thread...I feel so bad... __________________ Ken Thompson Fellowship of Christian Modelers http://www.fcmodelers.com

11-16-2007, 09:10 PM	#6
ShortBus Workin' the pole Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Hopewell Jct, NY Age: 20 Posts: 4,143 Awards Showcase Total Awards: 3	Re: How the fight started... I am offended by this. __________________

11-16-2007, 09:19 PM	#7
excelpoint Mother Hucker + Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: australia Age: 38 Posts: 2,407	Re: How the fight started... Sorry but that right there was just plane funny. LOL __________________ (ASAA) www.scaleaeros.com.au DESERT AIRCRAFT AUSTRALIA: NUMBER 1 FOR PRODUCT AND CUSTOMER SERVICE.

11-16-2007, 09:19 PM	#8
wizard It will fly!!! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Washington, Indiana Age: 48 Posts: 9,044 Awards Showcase Total Awards: 3	Re: How the fight started... I think I would have said "I know, you look like Grumpy!!" __________________ Prevent Darwinism become a paramedic!!! Never try to teach a pig to sing! It wastes your time and it annoys the pig!!! Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. Powered by Jim Beam

11-16-2007, 09:25 PM	#9
Absolut Yak Bad-ass Super Contributer! Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: Trenton, SC Posts: 290	Re: How the fight started... Wiping away the tears! That was beautiful! Lord, I apologize, and be with all the starving pigmies in New Guniea, AMEN.

11-16-2007, 09:41 PM	#11
dangerboy Prop Bender Extraordinaire Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Stone's throw from Bozeman, Montana Posts: 98	Re: How the fight started... Here's another one along the same lines: Please pray for Fred Fred was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him: "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in less than 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!!" The next morning Fred got up early and left for work.When his wife woke up she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, and brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Fred has been missing since Friday. Please pray for him. __________________ Wheelbarrows were invented to teach FAA inspectors how to walk on their hind legs. Last edited by dangerboy; 11-16-2007 at 09:43 PM. Reason: spacing was screwed up

11-16-2007, 09:46 PM	#12
Mudsurfer1234 Glow fuel sucks! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Boyertown, Pennsylvania Age: 21 Posts: 558	Re: How the fight started... ShortBus, you're like 9 feet tall... you take no offense... i on the other hand, who IS a dwarf, do take offense... but i'm sneezy... so it's a funny joke anyway!! hahahaha lawl lollerskatesinthemorningilikeeggs! __________________ http://hasthelargehadroncolliderdest...eworldyet.com/

11-17-2007, 12:11 AM	#13
3ddd tissue ? cry baby jack wagon! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: pyote,texas Age: 58 Posts: 2,651	Re: How the fight started... i don't care how big or small ya are that there is just plain funny ***** __________________ Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave >safely and in a well preserved body,but rather to skid in > sideways,totally screwed up,worn out,shouting,"oh damn what a fine ride! AMA 98634 > HEY I GOT A DIVORCE----HELL YEA > Futaba, FROMECO:a good way to get a charge out of life,,3w all the way for a good day

11-17-2007, 12:34 AM	#14
RTK Bad-ass Super Contributer! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Left Coast Age: 50 Posts: 3,720	Re: How the fight started... THE MIRACLE OF TOILET PAPER Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds." Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this take?" I asked. "They will grow larger over a period of years," my husband replies. I stopped. "Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?" Without missing a beat he says "Worked for your butt, didn't it?" He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even walk again, although he will probably continue to take his meals through a straw

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