Porcelain pilots lets hear your war stories.

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A-Track · 10-23-2009, 10:05 AM

Ok lets face it most of us on hear are dudes and what guy dosen't like a good poo story. If you got a funny or disgusting story lets hear it. Guess I'll get it started, probably not the greatest but I'll add more later.

So this one day I was driving to college through a rural area so there is no place to stop, and about 10 minutes out I start getting the cramps, you know the oh god this is not going to be good kinda cramps. Start looking around for options, it's spring time so theres no corn to hide in so I make the decision that I can make it to campus. Well I make it there and can't find a close parking spot, and by this time I'm starting to sweat on my forhead cuz the pain emminating from my bowles is getting so bad. Good news found a parking spot, bad news 2 blocks away. Now imaging trying to half run while keeping your cheaks clenched together as hard as you can cuz your afraid that if you don't your poo to air seperator is going to fail. Make it to the building run into the can and crap the only stall is occupied.

Run upstairs to the next bathroom and still thinking to myself that if I hurry I can make it to class. Made it on the can and before my cheaks could make it to the seat my colon exploded but dang did it feel good. Thankfully I did not get any on myself but I can't say the same for the wall. I felt a little bad for the janitor as I left...ok not really cuz I laughed, oh and I did not make it to class that day.

stumpy423 · 10-23-2009, 10:17 AM

yay!!! poo!!!

stumpy423 · 10-23-2009, 10:19 AM

i will get this thread going right

A-Track · 10-23-2009, 10:20 AM

Stumpy Remove the poo pics please and keep it pg 13

stumpy423 · 10-23-2009, 10:22 AM

better?

A-Track · 10-23-2009, 10:23 AM

Thanks

stumpy423 · 10-23-2009, 10:25 AM

	Quote: Originally Posted by A-Track
	Thanks

no worries

i dont think i have any stories... sorry

NCFRgal · 10-23-2009, 11:03 AM

Ok, well, if no one else is gonna contribute, I will.

Several years ago my husband worked for a small airline based out of Cincinnati. They flew Cessna Citation II's. Now for those of you who don't know what a Citation II is--it is a small jet that carries about 8 passengers and two crew (pilot and co-pilot)--no flight attendants, no bathrooms. The first story does not involve poo, but it is funny nonetheless. One time, while in flight, the cabin filled with smoke. As the pilot arranged for an emergency landing the co-pilot went back to see what was going on. He found one of the passengers--a business man in a suit and tie--laying on the floor in the rear of the cabin, pants unzipped, junk hanging out, covered in foam. Apparently he wandered back looking for the restroom and found the funnel to the fire extiguisher, assumed it was some sort of airline wizlocker and relieved himself--then pulled the trigger.

The second story involves one of the co-pilots. While enroute the co-pilot develops a rather urgent "intestinal requirement" that couldn't wait until they landed. Again, no facilities on board he reached for his duffel bag and used that. Now imagine yourself a passenger on this flight--there is only a curtain that separates you from the crew so there are no secrets between the crew and the passengers. Needless to say the co-pilot was the last one to leave the airplane with his bag full of...........stuff.

A-Track · 10-23-2009, 11:08 AM

	Quote: Originally Posted by NCFRgal
	Ok, well, if no one else is gonna contribute, I will. Several years ago my husband worked for a small airline based out of Cincinnati. They flew Cessna Citation II's. Now for those of you who don't know what a Citation II is--it is a small jet that carries about 8 passengers and two crew (pilot and co-pilot)--no flight attendants, no bathrooms. The first story does not involve poo, but it is funny nonetheless. One time, while in flight, the cabin filled with smoke. As the pilot arranged for an emergency landing the co-pilot went back to see what was going on. He found one of the passengers--a business man in a suit and tie--laying on the floor in the rear of the cabin, pants unzipped, junk hanging out, covered in foam. Apparently he wandered back looking for the restroom and found the funnel to the fire extiguisher, assumed it was some sort of airline wizlocker and relieved himself--then pulled the trigger. The second story involves one of the co-pilots. While enroute the co-pilot develops a rather urgent "intestinal requirement" that couldn't wait until they landed. Again, no facilities on board he reached for his duffel bag and used that. Now imagine yourself a passenger on this flight--there is only a curtain that separates you from the crew so there are no secrets between the crew and the passengers. Needless to say the co-pilot was the last one to leave the airplane with his bag full of...........stuff.

Ahahhahah now thats some funny stuff right there.

mattman683 · 10-23-2009, 02:22 PM

I was at a summer camp a few years ago. It was a week long and the only "available" restrooms latrines. They were discusting, a communal s@&t hole. So I decided i was going to hold it the whole week.....

After eating mass-produced food for 5 days I had it. I had a weeks worth of crap inside me. there was no way I was getting near those smelly latrines, so I took a shovel, and some tp and walked into the woods. I dug a nice hole unleashed a toilet cobra. Shoveled some dirt back on top and left. After everyone found out I was called "cat."

SleepyC · 10-23-2009, 02:27 PM

Well, there was this one time.. and i had eaten 14 bean burritos from TB and .. hmm... Nope can't tell that one.
Oh OH.. there was this time in college.. Nope can't tell tat one.
Oh I know, I was in a tree over a sidewalk. and .... nope can't tell that one.

DAMN... nevermind.

phippsj · 10-23-2009, 02:35 PM

Girlfriend's parents' house....huge lincoln log bowl climber....wouldn't flush down....no plunger....nothing to break it up with....dried floral arrangement on sink countertop....a few jabs with a long-stemmed rose....down she goes....rose stem goes back in vase....WHEW....that was close!!!

rduley · 10-23-2009, 02:38 PM

Ok...I once was higher in a tree than someone else over a sidewalk......poor guy below me in the tree!

mattman683 · 10-23-2009, 03:00 PM

	Quote: Originally Posted by rduley
	Ok...I once was higher in a tree than someone else over a sidewalk......poor guy below me in the tree!

I actually saw that once, my friend climbed a tree in a park went up really high and started peeing, somebody started to walk under him just as he finished. LOL

mattman683 · 10-23-2009, 03:04 PM

.

10-23-2009, 10:05 AM	#1
A-Track Who's got a paper clip? Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: United States, MN, Bloomington Age: 34 Posts: 15,044	Porcelain pilots lets hear your war stories. Ok lets face it most of us on hear are dudes and what guy dosen't like a good poo story. If you got a funny or disgusting story lets hear it. Guess I'll get it started, probably not the greatest but I'll add more later. So this one day I was driving to college through a rural area so there is no place to stop, and about 10 minutes out I start getting the cramps, you know the oh god this is not going to be good kinda cramps. Start looking around for options, it's spring time so theres no corn to hide in so I make the decision that I can make it to campus. Well I make it there and can't find a close parking spot, and by this time I'm starting to sweat on my forhead cuz the pain emminating from my bowles is getting so bad. Good news found a parking spot, bad news 2 blocks away. Now imaging trying to half run while keeping your cheaks clenched together as hard as you can cuz your afraid that if you don't your poo to air seperator is going to fail. Make it to the building run into the can and crap the only stall is occupied. Run upstairs to the next bathroom and still thinking to myself that if I hurry I can make it to class. Made it on the can and before my cheaks could make it to the seat my colon exploded but dang did it feel good. Thankfully I did not get any on myself but I can't say the same for the wall. I felt a little bad for the janitor as I left...ok not really cuz I laughed, oh and I did not make it to class that day. __________________

10-23-2009, 10:20 AM	#4
A-Track Who's got a paper clip? Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: United States, MN, Bloomington Age: 34 Posts: 15,044	Re: Porcelain pilots lets hear your war stories. Stumpy Remove the poo pics please and keep it pg 13 __________________

10-23-2009, 10:23 AM	#6
A-Track Who's got a paper clip? Join Date: Jun 2006 Location: United States, MN, Bloomington Age: 34 Posts: 15,044	Re: Porcelain pilots lets hear your war stories. Thanks __________________

10-23-2009, 11:03 AM	#8
NCFRgal Dirty Harry Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Lawrenceburg, IN Age: 47 Posts: 17,613	Re: Porcelain pilots lets hear your war stories. Ok, well, if no one else is gonna contribute, I will. Several years ago my husband worked for a small airline based out of Cincinnati. They flew Cessna Citation II's. Now for those of you who don't know what a Citation II is--it is a small jet that carries about 8 passengers and two crew (pilot and co-pilot)--no flight attendants, no bathrooms. The first story does not involve poo, but it is funny nonetheless. One time, while in flight, the cabin filled with smoke. As the pilot arranged for an emergency landing the co-pilot went back to see what was going on. He found one of the passengers--a business man in a suit and tie--laying on the floor in the rear of the cabin, pants unzipped, junk hanging out, covered in foam. Apparently he wandered back looking for the restroom and found the funnel to the fire extiguisher, assumed it was some sort of airline wizlocker and relieved himself--then pulled the trigger. The second story involves one of the co-pilots. While enroute the co-pilot develops a rather urgent "intestinal requirement" that couldn't wait until they landed. Again, no facilities on board he reached for his duffel bag and used that. Now imagine yourself a passenger on this flight--there is only a curtain that separates you from the crew so there are no secrets between the crew and the passengers. Needless to say the co-pilot was the last one to leave the airplane with his bag full of...........stuff. __________________ "You didn't see nuthin"

10-23-2009, 02:27 PM	#11
SleepyC Thanks for the Support! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: USA, OH, Aurora Age: 40 Posts: 22,071 Awards Showcase Total Awards: 4	Re: Porcelain pilots lets hear your war stories. Well, there was this one time.. and i had eaten 14 bean burritos from TB and .. hmm... Nope can't tell that one. Oh OH.. there was this time in college.. Nope can't tell tat one. Oh I know, I was in a tree over a sidewalk. and .... nope can't tell that one. DAMN... nevermind. __________________ Get the most current up-to-date R/C modeling news: www.flyinggiants.com www.rcgroups.com www.crackroll.com www.rccars.com

10-23-2009, 02:35 PM	#12
phippsj Shut up and Fly! Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Texas Posts: 1,060	Re: Porcelain pilots lets hear your war stories. Girlfriend's parents' house....huge lincoln log bowl climber....wouldn't flush down....no plunger....nothing to break it up with....dried floral arrangement on sink countertop....a few jabs with a long-stemmed rose....down she goes....rose stem goes back in vase....WHEW....that was close!!! __________________ Jim in Dallas

10-23-2009, 02:38 PM	#13
rduley Taming the Dragon Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: waynesville, ohio Posts: 12,388	Re: Porcelain pilots lets hear your war stories. Ok...I once was higher in a tree than someone else over a sidewalk......poor guy below me in the tree! __________________ Rob You sir are a GENIUS!!! You're awesome.....I don't care what Marian was saying about you the other day.

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